Bob Hutton As Summarized By Daz!
Bob Hutton has much to say.
And here is our Daz with a brilliant summation of Bob Hutton’s latest travesty of logic ( For the beginning of this “debate” I urge you to read the previous post). Daz is always funny and to the point but there are times when real brilliance shines through. Here he is.
The latest from Bob, aka The Internet’s Greatest Philosopher And Theologian, in a reply to a set of questions posted on his blog.
1. I do not believe in “debating” with unbelievers. This is because the word “debate” suggests that there are viewpoints on both sides. The Christian Gospel is not a viewpoint but a fact based on the truth as it is found in Jesus who proved His claims by rising from the dead.
2. The reason I suggest the use of the google search engine is to test the sincerity of my opponents. If they really want to know how I know the Bible is true then let them google the words “How we know the Bible is true” and they can search the answers for themselves.
3. You write about the risk of devaluing my cause. There are two problems with that statement – a) the cause of the Gospel is God’s, not mine. The Gospel is God’s truth and I simply declare it and b) if people do not believe the Bible, if they do not repent of their sins (including the sin of unbelief) and accept Jesus then the eternal loss will be theirs. It makes no difference to me if they die in their sins. I have given them the opportunity to be saved.
If I may paraphrase:
1: I am not actually interested in persuading unbelievers to the truth, thereby saving their souls. I just like to spout off.
2: I am incapable of forming any arguments of my own, never having really examined my beliefs for elements of truth, reality or logic.
3a: It’s God’s word, not mine. I just like to spout off.
3b: I am a hard-hearted bastard, uninterested in saving anyone from the tortures I believe they will suffer. “It makes no difference to me if they die in their sins” (direct quote), therefore I have no reason to be telling people that they’ll burn in hell, except that I enjoy publicly wallowing in thoughts of their putative suffering, whilst excusing this as ‘trying to save them’, although as shown above, I am trying to do no such thing.
Good summary Daz. I think you nailed him spot on.
And Bob. Ah Bob, Bob, Bob, sometime you simply must learn the fine art of shutting the fuck up. Really Bob! You have consistently been your own worst enemy in nearly everything you have said here. And as for your imaginary friend… Well, let’s just say that the best proof I now have of God the Bastard’s non-existence is fact that he doesn’t come to earth and beat the shit out of you for making him look like such a douchebag. Everytime you pick up your brush to paint him as majestic, he just ends up as some nutless jackass masturbating in the corner.
Michelangelo, you are not. Have a good day Bob.
“the best proof I now have of God the Bastard’s non-existence is fact that he doesn’t come to earth and beat the shit out of you for making him look like such a douchebag”
Perfection.
Daz–that is just beautiful! That made me literally laugh aloud
) He’s rather like an unfortunate combination of Lady Catherine (impertinently nosy and loves to be Of Use) and Mr. Collins (“not a sensible man, and the deficiency of nature had been but little assisted by education or society.”–ahh, why use your own words, when Jane’s are so much better!).
I do love an invigorating shot of logic first thing in the morning!
Being not exactly an atheist, at any rate a firm non-believer, I am also convinced that you would be making you point clearly enough without calling his God a Bastard.
Sorry if I seem too sensitive. This said, I find it amazing to know that defenders can write like Bob does. Enjoying this thread. Greetings
Just going by the crudest measurement of ‘niceness’, the death-toll, I’d say the figures speak for themselves. Sorry, but the only thing stopping this ‘god’ from being a bastard is the fact that he doesn’t actually exist.
Hey KK!
I’ve just finished reading the whole bible study to date and thought it was high time I commented. I wasn’t sure exactly where to comment because what I wanted to say isn’t specifically related to any particular post, so I just thought I’d tack it on to the end of the latest one, and hope someone reads it! I apologise for hijacking this comments section lol.
I just want to say how much I’ve enjoyed reading your posts. I have been a bit naughty in that I’ve been reading them all at work when I should be, oh I don’t know, WORKING, stealing quick glances over my shoulder constantly to check no one is looking. I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve had to think about dead kittens, or my mum trying to rap, or actually pinch myself in order to stop myself shaking with silent laughter reading your interpretations of The Bible. One part in particular is the story where Jacob is leading his family back home and he randomly wrestled that guy/angel on the riverbank. I actually burst out laughing at that, lucky there were no clients around to see me (I’m a receptionist). I actually had no idea until stumbling across this site just how…….um……INSANE, I guess, the Bible actually is. (I was going to say ‘backwards’ instead of insane, but even that seems like too neat a direction for such a warped book). Your knack for injecting humour into your writing is what has kept me coming back all week to read every single thing I could find. I don’t know how you have the patience to read and analyse the whole book, the language just does my head in. I think if I had tried to read the Bible myself, my brain probably would have spontaneously melted and dribbled out my ear all over my work clothes, leading to a fair few awkward questions, so I’m glad for people like you who can spell it out for me.
I’ve recently started looking into atheism (I just finished reading The God Delusion and LOVED IT!) and feminism and various other things in an attempt to reconcile a few contradictory attitudes I’ve had, and I’m slowly realising I’ve been AT LEAST agnostic my whole life, which is turning more into full blown atheism by the day. My earliest memory of rejecting religion was when I started school. I spent my first two years of primary school at a Catholic school and I remember one of my little friends trying to tell me that I had to love blowflies (keep in mind I live in Australia, so in summertime, bug spray is second only to suncreen in importance)because GOD made them. Even at the tender age of 5, I remember thinking something to the effect of ‘That, my friend, is BULLSHIT!’. Follow that up with being freaked out at compulsory church each week (The guy in the dress says something, and they all chant it back! Why does everyone magically know the lyrics to these creepy songs? What does ‘Hosanna in the highest’ mean? Whats with the insense, aaaaaaaaaah I’m only 5, help me, WTF?)and the revelation of my cousin saying to me ‘If God put the universe there, who put God there?’, and that was about me and Christianity done forever. I’m still having trouble shaking off a few leftover attitudes which I’m now learning are rooted in the bible. They are things I’ve taken for granted as true because thats the society I grew up in, and when I see first hand the suffering it can cause, I tend to have some immense internal conflict, mostly like ‘Ok, that attitude clearly is nonsensical, so what the hell do I do until I figure out what to replace it with?’
I realise I’m rambling, so long story short, your wit and humour is really helping me to end my cognitive dissonance, and I can’t wait to see what is coming next. I’ll be checking every day. No pressure.
I am honored. Very honored. Damn, Now I’m so jacked that I’ll have trouble sleeping. I was hoping to get my last post finished last weekend, but alas it didn’t. This morning I woke at five am and with an hour break for supper, I got home at ten pm. this will be my schedule for the rest of the week except that I’ll be skipping supper to be at the play early from now on. Opening night is Wednesday, you know. I already told the director that if I freeze on stage, I’m faking a heart attack and collapsing into the crowd. Alas, she didn’t find that as amusing as I did. Sigh. Anyway Jek. Your comment will keep me flying for a while. Thank you so much.
Haha if you freeze up, just imagine Moses in his underwear. He did invent it after all. Lol.
Welcome, Jek! I sat up night after night catching up on everything I’d missed when I found BABS, too
) KK has that effect on people (blush away, KK! You know you do!)
KK–good luck on opening night! Wish we could be there for real to cheer, but you know we’re cheering you on from around the globe!!
I see he hooked you just like he did the rest of us. Welcome, and good luck not getting caught at work! I’ve had a few close calls myself, but I just can’t stop coming back.
Gosh! You guys are making me blush. I’m highly flattered. I just need to have more time in life to post more. Anyone know how to give up the need for sleep?
“Anyone know how to give up the need for sleep?”
Not a good idea! See Arthur C Clarke Tales From The White Hart. I forget the title of the story, but you’ll know which one I meant when you get to it.
I would like to thankx for the eortffs you have put in composing this blog. I am hoping the same high-grade work from you in the upcoming as well. In fact your creative writing skill has inspired me to begin my own blog now. Truly the blogging is spreading its wings quickly. Your write up is a good model of it.
PS The above comment is supposed to say ‘Jek’, not anonymous. I don’t know why that didn’t come up.
Daz is always brilliant!
I envy his way with words. Well done.
Have fun Jek. Oh and regarding Daz and his bastard comment. I’m guessing you could be American. One of our English peculiarities is an ability to swear with complete gay abandon. It even seems to have rubbed off in KK.
just re-read this… it was KK that came out with that comment wasn’t it.. doh!
See KK you’re conversion into a ‘chap’ is going better than one would have imagined.
Hi KK,
I understand it’s your blog and you can post what you want, but you seem to have got a bit sidetracked. When are you going to go back to regularly posting your (hilarious) unpickings of the bible? I think it’s this that sets your blog apart from others.
OSB
Truth is Mr (Ms?) OSB is that I’m am completely swamped but look forward to a lot of time off in about two weeks. Then I will hit my old stride and hammer out a few dozen articles directly relating to the B ible. I often volunteer for more than I should and this last little bit has been a doozy. With the play, work and setting up our new freethinking group, I barely have time to kiss my honey bunny at night before collapsing into bed. Give me two and a half weeks and I be more regular. Um… I mean regular in the posting wise. Yeah…
Starting on the 18th of December, I have the rest of the month off and plan on writing constantly.
Sooner than that, I’ve got a piece in the pipe but it seem to be ending more seriously than funny. Sorry. I am honored that you think that this blog is set apart from others. I can’t tell you how much that means to me, so thank you and hope you stick around.
Ah, so I was just a handy space-filler, eh? That’s right, use me when it’s convenient, and throw me away. Men!Erm…
Looking forward to more Bile-study. We might even manage to keep the comments on topic for a few minutes…
‘Bile study’? Though come to think of it…
Damn Daz. You got a dead on head shot by accident. Sorry I’m video game fan. Funny without even intending so.
And don’t think of yourself as a space filler rather as a emergency reserve chute that in times of intense pressure I can call on to get me safely to the ground. Whew! Glad to have you buddy! Damned Glad. Same goes for the rest of you.
Today’s the 18th, KK! How’s the play going (did it go)? Any chance of any bits of it making their way to YT
)? Hope the level of the swamp has gone down! 
) Looking forward to reading your funnehs when you’re up to it (go on–have a couple of stiff eggnogs!)…
I’ll gear this review to 2 types of pepole: current Zune owners who are considering an upgrade, and pepole trying to decide between a Zune and an iPod. (There are other players worth considering out there, like the Sony Walkman X, but I hope this gives you enough info to make an informed decision of the Zune vs players other than the iPod line as well.)